COLUMNISTS

Manila Chansmouth SMOKE AND MIRRORS Let me first begin by admitting my dirty, little secret. I am a smoker. I've smoked since age 16; almost half my life. I grew up in Los Angeles, a town that virtually outcasts you for indulging in such a guilty pleasure.
Alex Lindsay Anger management We’ve all felt its presence at some time or other. That evil-faced gremlin called rage that can turn even the most placid Dr Jekyll among us into a devilish Mr Hyde. Browsing through my newspaper the other day I was hardly surprised to read that it had slipped out of its cage once again to wreak havoc in a new incarnation: dog rage.
Alex Lindsay Sherlock Holmes and other real people Time for a reality check, folks. I have long suspected that the digital age has blurred our ability to tell the real from the unreal, so that we’re in danger of stumbling into a never-never land, slipping down the rabbit hole to join Alice and her weird cohorts in Wonderland. It used to be quite clear-cut: I think, therefore I am. Now it has to be: I’m on Facebook, therefore I am. Whether
The Lady Boss For Jake’s sake So, the secret is out. Women want all men to be Jake Gyllenhaal. Or if they can’t actually be Jake himself, then they should do their darnedest to be a very close approximation of Jake Gyllenhaal. Yes, according to the latest survey, commissioned by Ridiculous Surveys Inc, women reckon Jake is the bee’s knees, the ant’s pants and the cat’s pyjamas all rolled into one. Then the British dating site, www.ukdating.com
Final say - By Philip Moore Size matters, baby You’ve got to be living under a rock or the north of England if you haven’t heard of the Nano by now. It’s the tiny sensation that got the world’s biggest motor show (that’s Detroit for the non-car-nerds) talking. More than that, everyone we spoke to was trying to find it, probably with a magnifying glass, although it wasn’t there.
The Lady Boss Valentine’s Day massacre The lead-up to Valentine’s Day is dreaded by men and women and rightly so. It can be a truly ghastly time whether you’re attached or not. For singletons, not only is there the onslaught of vile ads for cosy, overpriced dinners but there is also the pressure to spend February pretending that you don’t care that you’re so alone. This means co-opting your single friends for a night on the tiles of Oliver Reed proportions because it’s against the law to just stay
Alex Lindsay There’s no stopping the shopping They say nothing in life is certain except death and taxes. But I’ve got a couple of other things that I know are absolute constants in my life… 1. I shall never live long enough to see an airport that’s finished.
Final say - By Philip Moore I have a colleague who always drinks eight glasses of water a day. Goodness knows what happens if she strays to nine or gets slack and only puts away six or seven. We all receive precious pieces of medical wisdom. Sometimes even from medical people. Otherwise, particularly in the Gulf, such suggestions tend to come from those working in the hospitality area of civil aviation.
Alex Lindsay Gum shoe investigators leave sour taste Those grubby-fingered time travelers, the archeologists, never cease to amaze us with their astonishing finds - and the even more astonishing deductions they make from them.
The Lady Boss Women explained: What Are You Thinking?’ What are you thinking?” It’s the question designed to irritate men more than a stinging nettle in a jock strap yet still women persist in asking it.
Final say - By Philip Moore It appears those who supposedly know about such things have deduced that men talk more than women. Being what is commonly known as a ‘jibberer’ I do not find this mind-blowing news. As usual, scientific-type people have been paid – and probably paid well – to come up with the meta-analysis. This study comes from the University of Santa Cruz, California.
Alex Lindsay Fat Bond The world of international espionage was shocked to the core to learn that James Bond has quit his derring-do activities and retired to the island of Sodor, home of children’s favourite Thomas the Tank Engine. Pierce Brosnan, the last but one Bond, has agreed to become the voice of the Fat Controller, who is the narrator and Thomas’s boss in the latest TV series.
Sarah Simmons Avoiding festive tears A few years back I can remember dating Joe, a true text book – tall, dark and handsome – the whole package. We’d been together a few of months and it seemed to be going well. The festive season was right around the corner and this time there was just no getting away from the dreadful task ahead…we were going to have to buy each other
Alex Lindsay Passionate Plea Bargain Ah, passion! That simple word that has brought giants of men to their knees, has made blubbering fools of kings, has changed the world more than any army ever did. It is the raw emotion that locked Anthony and Cleopatra into a suicidal spiral that changed the course of history. That led Romeo and Juliet into a star-crossed tangle and onwards to disaster.
Yvette Vuaran How to Sock it to them When I look a man over, I check out his eyes first to make sure they are clean and healthy because when shopping for fish, choose only those fish with clear eyes. Cloudy eyes are also indicators of loss of freshness) and then his teeth (make sure there are no vampirish associations). His shoulders are important (can he carry me?), his hands
Alex Lindsay Do you have a problem? Life is full of problems. Some are trivial, like working out which chocolate in the box to eat first. Others can be as forbidding as trying to walk up Mount Everest with a Yeti strapped to your back. Nevertheless, not a day goes by without some niggle popping up to bump up our blood pressure and bring us just that bit closer to meeting our maker. There’s no sure way of escaping the problem trap, although Josef Stalin
Alex Lindsay Rimmed madness There used to be a saying: Men don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses. But that has long since been consigned to the dustbin of history, along with other potentially politically incorrect gems like a woman’s place is in the home and a woman’s work is never done.
Yvette Vuaran Gatsby 2.0 I was on a late night flight home from a modeling shoot when it happened. I had agreed to sit in the emergency exit seat in the aisle after looking around and deciding that, if necessary, I would open the door for these people. My sleep, filled with dreams of saving passengers as the plane crashed into the sea, was disturbed not long after